The Song I Love Since I Was Child... I Remember This Song...

I Remember this song.. Since i was child i love marriage life.. I was naive even until now about my relationship. I thought i was in a happiness when i was getting married.. But then ... Something bad happen to someone and he died. All my dreams and hope just died with him. I cried so much until i cannot even feel myself anyone. Then one day.. out of somewhere.. I met Ken.. at first that i thought he was a playboy.. I thought he just want to have fun.. Deep in my heart i was scare.. In my heart i ask myself will he be the right guy for me? I remember that we make plans to go Bangkok for our first meeting.. But then my health was bad again.. I think at that time my heart still didnt recover from the pain i have after loosing him... When everytime Ken phone me.. I keep asking myself if i want to pick up the phone.. I remember that time, i ask myself.. Will he lie to me? Will he just want to have fun un Bangkok?

After i make decision to go London for operation, i didnt know that Ken already go Bangkok. That time he have to go because he already buy the airticket. After i know that i was so guilty. In my heart i was sad because at that time i didnt go there and i didnt meet Ken.

Then i realise that Ken was worried and caring towards me. I keep asking myself why this guy is so good to me? At that time i was thinking he is so far and it is impossible for us to be together. I think of that because i dont want to get hurt of loosing someone again. That feeling i cannot take it anymore.

Then.. Later we fell in love.. for now i remember its already 1 year ++ and there is so many things that happen to me change my life so much..

But i know there is still one thing that i didnt change.. I am still as naive girl and also i am scare of loosing someone again. I just hate that feeling.

When i listen to this song, it just make me remember about my thinking so much in love..

SQUALL
********
さっきまでの 通り雨が
ウソみたいにキレイな空
そんなふうに 微笑むから
いつのまにかうれしくなるよ


ちょっと大きなあなたのシャツ
通した袖をつまんでみた今...
私恋をしている 哀しいくらい
もう隠せないこの切なさは
もっといっしょにいたい
二人でいたい
叶えて欲しい 夏の憧れ
さがしてたあなただけ...

汗をかいた アイスティーと
撮りすぎたポラロイド写真
あんなふうに ハシャいだから
帰り道はさみしくなるよ

夕焼け染まる駅のホーム
手を振るあなた遠くなって行く...

私恋に落ちてる 苦しいくらい
もう隠せない熱いときめき
ずっとめぐり逢うこと 夢に観てたの
わかって欲しい夏の憧れ

And I touched the rain
So I need your love

私恋をしている 恋に落ちてる
もう隠さない熱いときめき
やっとめぐり逢えたの 夢に観てたの
醒めることない夏の憧れ
さがしてたあなただけ...

English
*******
The sky is so beautiful
Making the recent rain seem like a lie

Because you smile like that
I get happy without even noticing

Your slightly-too-large shirt
I just now grabbed onto the sleeve as you passed...

I'm so much in love it's sad
I can't hide this pain anymore
I want to be with you more
Just the two of us
I want you to make my summer longing come true
I've been searching, just for you...

The sweating glasses of iced tea
And too many Polaroids

Because we frolicked around like that
The way home seems so lonely

The train station dyed by the sunset
You wave your hand as you get farther away...

I'm falling in love so much it hurts
I can't hide this passion anymore
I always dreamed
That we'd meet each other
I want you to understand my summer longing

And I touched the rain!
So I need your love

I'm in love, I'm falling in love
I won't hide this passion anymore
I dreamed
That we finally met
An unending summer longing
I've been searching, just for you...